This apology, fucking accept it

It's almost 1AM and I spent two hours sobbing into a pillow because I realize how much of a hot headed, unpredictably moody person I am. No one likes that. And I've taken it out on my friends... That's not good, either. And for some reason, they don't like accepting my apologies, but I'm gonna do it again anyway.

Oh god, Lightning Crashes just came on... I'm gonna cry again... OK I'M ON A MISSION. I'm sorry, from the very bottom of my ugly, useless heart, I'm SORRY. ES OH AR AR WHY!

I've felt like waste because my twin isn't here, so I don't feel like I should be here either, especially with all the shit I cause. He/she'd be a much better friend and person, but the world just ain't right, so you're left with me. I'm pretty dumb, not talented with anything, and am not that fun to hang around with. But you guys stuck around anyway, god only knows why... And for some reason you're all loyal. To this dumbss loner. I don't know how you do that.

So like, everyday I think of all of you, because being said loner, who else am I gonna wanna be with? And here's the thing, I always convince myelf I've done something to upset you guys. It's dumb, but trust, you never wanna be in my brain when this happens. It. Sucks.

I dont like it, but if I feel like I've done anything to get you guys down, I need to fix it, so I go along with it. It doesn't make sense, but to me it's just how stuff goes. I don't know what it'll take to stop it, because goddamn I'm crazy, but it's not something to take out on anyone... A little help would be nice though, you know someone like me can't do it alone.

I love you all, please, for the love of Odin, just say "I forgive ya", not "YOU DON'T GOTTA BE SORRY LAWL". That is bullshit, sir. I don't deserve the loyalty.